Gloria Swanson's Butterless Devil's Food Cake

Oh my goodness! It is with much excitement that I report that the first edition of Vintage Life magazine is out and it has my article on GLORIA in it. Oh how very lovely! I am going to try and link to it here...

http://www.exacteditions.com/exact/browse/588/1101/6824/3/49/0/

I had heared nothing from the editor for months so assumed that she wasn't going to run it - just IMAGINE if I'd known before - it would have completely blown my Gloria Swanson frock competition as the answer to the question I posed is right in there!

It has cheered my up no end - still no word at all from the New Yorker who stood me up last night - he has brought disrepute on a whole city with his dating style!

Oliver Hardy's Spaghetti Sauce

Ah, Sunday afternoon and Columbo on the tele. Heavenly.

Again, I have a humdinger of a hangover and red wine lips. Temperance month is not really happening is it? I'm cooking some of Ollie's Spaghetti Sauce in an attempt to feel better.

It was a wonderful evening last night chez Jean. It was Oscars night, a week after the event but hugely enjoyable nevertheless. We had some Hollywood canapes and a Gloria Swanson Devil's Food Cake alongside his delicious terrines and little cups of celeriac soup. Cries of "look at his HAIR!" and "what IS she wearing?" filled the air as we had great sport putting our oars in. Ava showed us her lovely new feet with great pride. Beautiful they are too. I bet she can't wait to get those into a pair of strappy sandals for spring.

I can never see a terrine without thinking of Ava and her hospitalization due to sliding on a terrine. Ha ha! I must get her to tell me the story again, I'm sure I've altered it in my mind but she almost definitely ended up with a terrine shaped bruise on her bum.

Talking of bruises, the lovely Preston got me a ticket to a special screening of the new roller derby movie "Whip-It" on Saturday night. I loved it. Juliette Lewis rocked as Iron Maven and it was great to see some familiar faces amongst the roller girls in the audience. RAWHIDE!

Gloria Swanson's Caviar Canapes

"They took the idols and smashed them,
the Fairbankses, the Gilberts, the Valentinos!
And who've we got now? Some nobodies!"

Oh Lord, I have an almighty hangover. The ladies of the book group came round last night and I think I drank 5 times as much as the rest put together. Maybe I was nervous as I was the hostess... We met at Villiers Terrace for a cocktail first - maybe that's what did it, my Vodkatini? I wore the dress I had bought specifically to wear to the Brits. I figured that the ladies would appreciate it more than the New Yorker!

It was an ace night though, love those sassy women. There was much discussion about all the teenage passion in the book we have just read. We wondered whether I was the least hot and bothered over it as I've been having that stuff for real lately. As the only non-married one in the group I guess I'm closer to the teenager than most.

My lovely supportive chum Paulette was on hand to assist with the dinner. She made the Gloria Canapes and introduced the innovation of CRUMBLING the egg yolks rather than putting them through the sieve. Nice. The spinach pie turned out fine and the Ida Lupino Lemon Mousse - divine. I was so drunk by the time that came out that I took the risky decision to zap the big vat of it in the microwave to soften it up for serving. Worked fine and there is LOADS left over. I shall feed some to Charley when he comes over for his birthday dinner tomorrow.

Cecil B DeMille's Cajun Chicken

"Creation is a drug I can't do without."

I am feeling the same myself this week Cecil - I am ON FIRE!

Had a fabulous, fabulous day today pottering around in the kitchen making the Sunset Boulevard Luncheon. There is definitely a new calm descending on these kind of events as much hilarity was to be had over the fact that my William Holden Gelatine dish hadn't set - it provoked gales of laughter in the kitchen as I approached my guests wobbling the plate of goo...

Cecil's chicken was a big hit. Just the right amount of spice I think and a big ole chicken from the butcher just about served 5 - Rosalind, Jimmy, King, me and special surprise guest John G who came mostly on the promise of seeing Charley who alas couldn't make it.

Jimmy looked marvellous in his baker boy cap, short trousers and argyle socks. I wish I'd had time to make him a megaphone... King looked impeccable in his bib and tucker and Rosalind was resplendent in her mini-me "good angel" Norma Desmond outfit. I was all in black velvet and she was in white turban and flashy wrap around number. John G came at the last minute so proclaimed, "I'm in my jummy" and it made me laugh as he looked just cosy in his cardi.

After lunch we all flopped on the sofa to watch the movie and it wasn't until John shouted, "Is anyone awake?" That we realised that we had all slept right through the first half. Shades of the VERY FIRST Silver Screen Sunday - "All About Eve" at Rosalind's place over 3 years ago - May 2006...

Gloria Swanson's Butterless Devils Food Cake

The cake is made but there is much more to do before everyone arrives at 1 o'clock for the Sunset Boulevard extravaganza. I should be getting on with it but I MUST report on my date last night with the New Yorker.

He took me to dinner at Nobu. A place I didn't think someone like me was allowed to go into...

We were supposed to just meet there for a cocktail and when he asked me if I liked sushi I didn't get the chance to say, "it's my least favourite food" as he was already halfway up the stairs trying to secure us a table. This he did, best seats in the house and I felt like Julia Roberts in "Pretty Woman" as he ordered all kinds of revolting sounding things for us to eat and instructed me on the best way to hold my chopsticks. I did try and stick up for myself by saying, "I learned to hold them the Essex way" but I don't think he got the cultural reference.

Despite my horror at the idea of eating eel, I have to admit that this was - without a doubt - the most delicious meal I have ever eaten - bar none. Everything was DIVINE including the squid with its gelatinous suckers. At one point I pointed with my chopsticks at some unidentified crispy things sticking out of a crab roll, "what's that?" I asked, "crab" he replied. "What, his little legs and everything?" I asked, amazed that there was a miniature half a crab in crispy batter just sitting there for me to eat. So I did, his little legs and his little claw - just like that!

When my date asked if I liked fat salt pork I didn't get a chance to say that my only experience of it was trying to buy some (and failing) for the Bette Davis' Boston Baked Beans recipe. I was wary of it at first - thinking it would be all fatty like spare ribs but I can honestly say it was the most delicious thing I have EVER eaten. From now on that would be my death row meal request. Just one single square of that.

I can't even begin to tell you where we went after we had eaten, but I CAN tell you that at one point I could see Rosalind's 9th floor flat WAY BELOW ME as I was 385 feet above London!

PS - for those who know Nobu - of course the piggy thing I ate was pork belly not fat salt pork. I am an INGENUE!

Gloria Swanson's Butterless Devil's Food Cake

"I feel sure that unborn babies
pick their parents."

Well if that is true Gloria, I have very good taste!

Today I went up to Suffolk for a surprise 80th birthday party for my lovely mum. Miraculously all 5 of us kids made it - despite the snow, plus assorted partners and a smattering of grandchildren. We had a lovely time as the wine flowed freely as did the conversation. It was just wonderful.

My plan of taking a Gloria Swanson Devil's Food Cake AND a Rita Hayworth's Angel's Food Cake FAILED. I blame two things firstly, not using the right tools for the job (my soup masher just would not whip the egg whites to stiff - it got very, very hot and smelt a bit like a fairground dodgem - it may well be bust) secondly RICKY WHITTLE. Gloria's cake stuck to the cake mould and ultimately never made it out of the kitchen because I lost track of how long it had been in the oven due to Mr Whittle's Cha-Cha. My goodness me. Rita's made it to Suffolk but although it looked lovely, had the texture of a brick. More testing required and a wire whisk to be bought.

Despite me feeling like a very poor cook today it ultimately didn't matter as there was mountains of food and mountains of love so a stodgy birthday cake wasn't really anything to worry about...

Gloria Swanson's Butterless Devil's Food Cake

"Because I take care of my body,
it doesn't look like the body of a woman of my years."

Same here Gloria, honestly!

Wow, I have had such a great reaction from work colleagues to Gloria's cake. Admittedly it did contain over a bar of Green & Black's Expresso Chocolate but yes, to paraphrase Mr Tibble downstairs, it was freakin awesome! I shall make another soon to test the cooking time. I made it in my fancy silicone tube pan thingy so I'll need to test it as a plain and simple sponge cake too.

Had SUCH a lovely weekend with Ginger and Grace - our annual girls weekend Christmas shopping at the seaside. Who would have thought it, when we all decided to live together we were three single girls and now look at the pair of them! Ha ha. One is married and pregnant, the other is heading that way - tee hee! So they both gave me a good talking to about how I should give a NICE man a go for a change.

Sigh. Not sure I am wired up for a nice boyfriend, but I might give it a go...

Gloria Swanson's Butterless Devil's Food Cake

"Hollywood abounded with driven creatures endlessly looking for solace
or compensation in alcohol, drugs, and sex."

Well after the weekend I've just had the same could be said of North London Gloria.

I am still reeling from Nazimova's party, I was so out of control my ears are still ringing...

Still, to the cooking. To celebrate the birthday of Rosalind’s beau Jimmy I made some cup cakes using Gloria Swanson’s Butterless Devil’s Food Cake recipe. The butter icing I made to go on top probably ruined the health benefits of a cake made with super high quality Green & Black’s plain chocolate and no butter, but they were pretty delicious anyhow.

Gloria was somewhat of a health freak in her day. Very interested in a macrobiotic style diet and wholefoods in general she was. I wouldn’t be surprised if she is the secret star for whom the Hollywood 12 day diet was conceived.

After my trauma over Charley’s new girlfriend I managed to knock 5 years off Jimmy’s life by decorating his birthday cakes with the number 30. At least I didn’t add 5 years on…