Joan Bennett's Baked Salmon

"If only Vivien Leigh had stayed in England,
that part would have been mine."

Hmm. I presume Joan is talking about Vivien's role in Gone With The Wind there. Intriguing. Can't imagine Joan in that part.

Well, bouncing up and down to the Kaiser Chiefs on Friday seems to have dislodged the feeling sorry for myself molecules. I'm still planning to download Nick Cave singing, "Nobody's Baby Now" just in case I need it though. I have reprogrammed my phone so that the screensaver has the floating message, "NOBODY CALLED!" which makes me laugh everytime I see it.

I am turning my energy to the writing and a strong streak of fiction scribbling has appeared out of nowhere. I guess all the energy I have been putting into men is being redirected. Good. A sea change.

Joan's Salmon was kind of weird. I did a veggie version for Paulette which was probably nicer than the bacon infused version myself and Ivor waded through. The beetroot, goats cheese and lentil salad was much nicer.

I apologise for recent confusion between Warner Baxter and George Bancroft - the brain has been boy addled.

George Bancroft's Luscious Savory Beef Stew

A very SNAZZY picture of George that I didn't see yesterday when I looked...

It is very late (past midnight) and I am very drunk (2 pints and approximately 1 bottle of red) so this will be short. The Stew was a hit and Charley said, "Good staight ahead vittles" which is obviously a compliment (especially as he had seconds).

It is always lovely to see Charley and I hereby apologise publically for upsetting him in a previous blog entry, All of this blog activity is merely an aide memoire to the things I have cooked, the friends I have shared them with and the men I have loved and lost… Ha ha!

I hereby decide to focus on things like the forthcoming SWAPARAMA, the chance of doing my Pavlov's Dog style Kaiser Chief's dance on Friday and the fact that Elvis (the cat with a bad foot I am looking after) is lapping up the George Baxter leftovers as I type...

George Bancroft's Luscious Savory Beef Stew

"In nine times out of ten, the slanderous tongue belongs to a disappointed person."

Well that's about the size of it. I am a disappointed person. Still, it's only Tuesday... I have recovered my equilibrium somewhat and am looking forward to cooking up a feast for Charley tomorrow and seeing what he has to say about it all. If I get the afternoon off work it will be George Bancroft's Beef Stew which takes about 3 hours to cook. If not, it will be Joan Bennett's Baked Salmon.

I can hardly be moody about it tonight with Desmond on the radio followed by an Al Bowlly documentary on BBC4... Anyhow, my luck is changing. First of all a man in the street said, "NICE LEGS" to me this morning (admittedly I had remarked upon the fact he was dancing in the street by saying, "NICE MOVES") and then later I got a text from the lovely BBC telling me I had won two tickets to go and see the Kaiser Chiefs on Friday night.

Na na na na naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Joan Blondell's Sunday Night Special

I've been holding a candle for a man named Joe for about two years and last week he announced totally out of the blue that he'd broken off his engagement and wanted to see me for a drink on Friday night. I hardly dared imagine that it might be a date and just assumed that as usual he would counsel me on my turbulent lovelife. After many dirty martinis at the Hungry Bear we ended up in bed.

After a night of much passion he left in the morning telling me once more how "hot" I was and saying he'd phone me later "just to say hi". As Rosalind would say, "manners!" She said that he has always been her favourite (even though she has never met him) as he has always been a shining example of a man who is emotionally intelligent and nice to women.

But what does "later" mean? I behaved like Briget Jones all day yesterday and most of today waiting for a call and there has been tumbleweed. I decided that I was only going to think about it until noon then go out for a "meat cure" and when my expensive Sunday roast turned up and it was cold I CRIED. Right in the middle of the pub. Oh for goodness sake.

So now I am settled in for the afternoon to watch Gone With the Wind with a few beers and then later if I can drag myself out of the funk I will cook Joan Blondell's Sunday Night Special.

I do NOT understand. Perhaps I should just turn myself into a HORNET like Scarlett O'Hara.

Ooh, there he is. Clark Gable at the bottom of the stairs. That's cheered me up.

David Niven's My Man Godfrey Cocktail

"I have a face that is a cross between two pounds of halibut
and an explosion in an old clothes closet."

I don't usually write about things I haven't made myself but I must just mention the marvellous "My Man Godfrey" cocktail served in the 5th floor bar of Waterstones, Piccadilly.

On Tuesday I was attending a "spiv" night with readings by the seriously handsome stockabilly. I decided to fortify myself with a cocktail to fend off a possible swooning fit and the first thing I spotted on the menu was a Niven themed number which seemed wholly apt. The waitress poured it at my table with an expert vermouth swirling technique and a chunk of lemon rind squashed around the rim of the glass. Scrumptious.

I have to confess that I had two more after the show and was so squiffy I lost my nice umbrella somewhere on the way home. By way of a contrast, the following night I found myself at a late night drinking session at a tattoo parlour... I wonder how a tattoo of a martini glass would look?

Ann Sheridan's Chili Casserole

What do you see for me in your crystal ball Ann? Several days of waiting for The Artist to call me on the phone I expect...

I remembered that Ann's Chili Casserole needed testing for the book so we had that last night and the ladies liked it. We almost polished it off between the three of us and we all liked the flavour imparted by the cloves. I had to make a minor modification to the recipe though. I went up to my local corner shop and asked the nice man if he had any celery. "Stella - yes!" he said, pointing to the beer fridge. "No," I said, "celery, it's a vegetable". He just shook his head and said, "Stella?" again so I used a leek instead.

Mind you, it was an easy mistake to make on his part. I am far more likely to be in that corner shop buying beer than vegetables these days...

Richard Arlen's Chili Con Carne

Well would you believe it? The very DAY after I spend the weekend canoodling with a new squeeze WHO should phone out of the blue to "see how I am" but the chaw-bacon. He must be finely attuned to the vibrations throughout the ether of an ex girlfriend finally putting a nail in the coffin.

Tonight I shall make the ladies a Chili Con Carne - from memory the one proposed by Richard Arlen was the best so far so I shall hunt down that recipe and remake it. Turning quite chilly in the UK and the nights are drawing in so it is a time for stews, casseroles, hot pots and chilis.

Onwards and upwards those cosy nights in wearing the house pyjamas.

Joan Blondell's Onion Soup

“I don't know what the secret to longevity as an actress is. It's more than talent and beauty. Maybe it's the audience seeing itself in you.”

Another winnner from my favourite of all the stars. I rustled it up for Grace and Ginger exactly as per Joan's recipe. My little copyright buster was to cut the toasted stale bread into a little circle with a pastry cutter before sprinkling on the parmesan. What a treat to find a soggy cheesy bit of bread at the bottom of your soup eh?

I must admit though when I returned to the house after watching a most entertaining independent film about Walthamstow Market it was like something out of an Emile Zola novel in there. The smell of onions was mighty strong throughout number 43. This morning in the shower it was coming out of my big old mop of hair too. Still, I amused myself by having a crack at singing, "The world is just a great big onion..." and now I am hopeful that I smell a bit nicer.

Things are afoot in the love life thank goodness.


The Artist seems to be on the verge of making a date for me to pose for him. He will be inspecting my head for bumps as he portrays everyone as a baldy. Should be fun.

Ida Lupino's Lemon Mousse

"My agent had once told me that he was going to make me the Janet Gaynor of England - I was going to play all the sweet roles."

I've been in a bit of a spin since my last entry. Just after I finished Marlene's delicious lamb chops and was just about to find out who won Big Brother the phone rang and a bombshell was dropped. I cannot reveal all the ins and outs of it here as it is sub judice but suffice to say I am just back from the Mortimer Market Centre and most definitely, for the first time in about 2 and a half years 100% single.

Anyhow, life goes on and one has to eat. I hereby give a public vote of thanks to Paulette who, completely understanding the tizz I get myself into when cooking for more than 2 other people rustled up some of Ida's mousse for the book group. It was, as usually totally delicious and at least I know that one recipe translated into English measurements actually works.

Much industry on the book proposal and sorting out my love life and not enough time cooking. Still, Joan Blondell's French Onion Soup is on the cards for tonight. Tres bien.

Marlene Dietrich's Lamb Chops en Casserole For One

"Glamour is what I sell, it's my stock in trade."

Ahhhhhhh. My 3 week writing retreat in Crouch End is almost at an end. There's a cat on the stairs, the sprinkler is on in the garden, my massive foot is elevated and propped up on a cushion, there's a Marlene Dietrich casserole in the oven and it is the final night of Big Brother 8. Hence, I am having a big night in with me, myself and I and a "6 for £5" bunch of beers.

All is well in Silver Screen Suppers world.

Gloria Swanson's Butterless Devil's Food Cake

"Hollywood abounded with driven creatures endlessly looking for solace
or compensation in alcohol, drugs, and sex."

Well after the weekend I've just had the same could be said of North London Gloria.

I am still reeling from Nazimova's party, I was so out of control my ears are still ringing...

Still, to the cooking. To celebrate the birthday of Rosalind’s beau Jimmy I made some cup cakes using Gloria Swanson’s Butterless Devil’s Food Cake recipe. The butter icing I made to go on top probably ruined the health benefits of a cake made with super high quality Green & Black’s plain chocolate and no butter, but they were pretty delicious anyhow.

Gloria was somewhat of a health freak in her day. Very interested in a macrobiotic style diet and wholefoods in general she was. I wouldn’t be surprised if she is the secret star for whom the Hollywood 12 day diet was conceived.

After my trauma over Charley’s new girlfriend I managed to knock 5 years off Jimmy’s life by decorating his birthday cakes with the number 30. At least I didn’t add 5 years on…

Greta Garbo's Swedish Meatballs x 2

"Gif me a visky, ginger ale on the side. And don't be stingy, baby."

Maybe if I hadn’t drunk so much I wouldn’t have ended up wailing and howling late into the night then waking up surrounded by piles of snotty tissues.

Charley came over for meatballs and in conversation mentioned that his new girlfriend was 14 years younger than me. Gadzooks. There aint no words of wisdom from Greta that are going to help with that.

Maybe a mantra though… "I want peace and peace I will have."

I keeled over in the library today – a humdinger of a fall which brought five people running to help me up. I decided to go home and watch an afternoon movie to get over it. Luckily “The Man Who Came to Dinner” is on and I can sympathise with Monty Woolley being wheeled around in a bath chair after falling down some steps. Out of the corner of my eye I am watching my ankle swell up to the size of a football.

The hats in this movie are gorgeous. I want a little skating hat with a pom-pom on top.

Charley’s verdict on the meatballs? Too many cornflakes, not enough meat.

Oliver Hardy's Spaghetti With Tomato Sauce

"We never see ourselves as others see us."

After a week of insane bills being run up on ebay by my internet hacker I settled down to Oliver Hardy's Spaghetti with Grace to try and forget about it all for a few minutes. We decided it was quite an apt dinner for such a bon viveur and found it easy to imagine Mr Hardy tucking a big white napkin into his bow tie to catch the spaghetti sauce splashes.

Charley was a bit peeved when I spoke to him on the phone and I revealed what I had been eating. I was supposed to cook this for HIM, as he is a Son of the Desert and all that. Well I'll have another go sometime and he can try and educate me once more into why Laurel and Hardy make so many boys so very happy.

How many women are fans?

William Powell's Beets Piquant

“I highly recommend worrying. It is much more effective than dieting.”

Well the worrying is over for Ginger. She exploded into the house yesterday evening with the fabulous news that she has scored a great new job with S&S. Yippee. We celebrated with a bowl of Beets Piquant and a glass of champagne. A very nice combination. We agreed that a big hairy steak and a healthy green salad might go down well with the beets for a big meal but Ginger was off to meet the in-laws for a family dinner and I was off to the Cafe de Paris for an industry party.

As I got purple beetroot juice all over my hands, the kitchen floor and the kettle I had a mini daydream about meeting a handsome new man at the party. Radio 2 broke my mood though as just as I started thinking about it they played a song with a chorus along the lines of, "You came on your own, and that's how you'll leave". And of course it was exactly thus...

Janet Gaynor Ice Box Cookies

Deep in the depths of the magical New Forest another batch of JGIBCs were cooked up. Early in the morning before most of my fellow writers began shuffling into the enormous kitchen for their herbal teas and barley cups I sliced and baked whilst in my kimono and slippers.

These were gluten free versions and although more crumbly than usual they were a nice mid morning snack sitting beside the fountain with the fish beneath our feet as we tried to write a surrealist poem. What a lovely way to get away from the hurly burly...

Joan Blondell's Peach and Cherry Compote

"In the 20s, you were a face. And that was enough. In the 30s, you also had to be a voice.
And your voice had to match your face, if you can imagine that."

Well, my favourite star of all came up with another winner. Even though this dish included an alarming amount of icing sugar and MARSHMALLOWS it wasn't as sugary sweet as expected and with a nice chunk of Green and Black's Vanilla ice-cream was a perfect end to a perfect Sunday lunch.

Can't believe that my Silver Screen Suppers Sister of the Skillet has already gone back to Texas. Not long enough! We had a great 5 days brainstorming on the project but the glamorous globetrotter had to go back to the homestead. We are planning our Texas Film Round Up trip already and are aiming to cook each of our 26 star recipes at least once by the end of August. Yippe-io!

Jean Harlow's Celery a la Shrimp

"She didn't want to be famous. She wanted to be happy."

So said Clark Gable...

Poor Jean - only 26 when she died. Lots of people were madly in love with her - including William Powell it is rumoured.

We liked her crispy shrimpy celery. We had a "taste test" involving stuffed celery to Jean's recipe and some modified with style by Ruth. Admittedly the modified version was more suited to the modern palate but we did like the subtle pinky green hue of Jean's original.

Cary and William were over for lunch and much discussion was had as to whether a sprinkling of paprika or cayenne pepper would perk it up. We may have to include a health warning though that inhalation of cayenne can cause a choking fit that might amuse other diners but isn't much fun to the pepper throated cougher.

Dorothy Dare's Flora Macaroons

As Doris observed, it looks like Dorothy Dare is WEARING her Flora Macaroons in this frock...

Much fun in the kitchen while these were being made and the resulting propped and styled photographs were as pretty as a picture. We don't know why they are called "Flora" Macaroons but this title led Doris into taking on the persona of Flora Macdonald in a tartan throw. We made her take off her head torch for the photos.

The Macaroons were very tasty indeed but the recipe needed a bit of modification. Also, where does one buy rice paper these days?

Anna Sten's Coffee Parfait

In a country kitchen in Devon with a whirlwind of cooking activity going on around me I attempted another version of the Coffee Parfait, this time from the pen of the actress Gary Cooper referred to as "Anna Stench". The fact that I was on a cookery writing course surrounded by PROPER cooks only added to my shame when the cream curdled and the resulting Parfait looked more like runny beige cottage cheese. Not a dish with the "gosh" factor the food editors are looking for by any means.

Doris Day came to the rescue with her excellent solution of heating the milky mess and adding some egg yolks and sherry thus turning what could have been a disaster into a Baileys-esque after dinner tipple for fifteen.

Margaret Sullavan's Peanut Butter Hermits

"Most actors are basically neurotic people. Terribly, terribly unhappy.
That's one of the reasons they become actors."

Well there is a word of warning for myself and Grace. Might help prevent a cat scrap over the handsome new rockabilly...

Margaret's recipe stated that there would be enough cookie dough for "eighteen Hermits" and so there was. I packed some up for Ginger to take to a family lunch where they were a great success. Both Clark and Betty declared them to be delicious and Betty said that she would eat a lot of more of them if she wasn’t trying to lose a stone by next Sunday. Cyd is worried about her hips but nonetheless enjoyed them. I know what they are saying now I have just eaten one for breakfast. The calorific content of just one Hermit is probably equivalent to a big fry up.

I took most of the rest of the Hermits up to Penny at the shop. I was musing over why they were called Peanut Butter Hermits and she decided that it was because they were designed for people who lived alone and ate a lot of peanut butter.

Well I DO eat a lot of peanut butter, but by Jove I don't live alone. Thank heavens for my wonderful housemates. We are having a barrel of fun in the Stowe and on Friday night went to a rocking Grease themed party where I won second prize for my prom frock outfit. Later I learned some legs akimbo rock chick air guitar moves from Grace who was sporting a remarkable pair of electric blue skin tight Sandy pants. Ha ha. It's a great life.